Betrayal, Resilience, and Transformation with Dr. Tristina Anderson
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Cathy:Welcome to late boomers, our podcast guide to creating your 3rd act with style, power, and impact. Hi. I'm Cathy Worthington.
Merry:And I'm Merry Elkins. Join us as we you conversations with successful entrepreneurs, entertainers, and people with vision who are making a difference in the world.
Cathy:Everyone has a story, and we'll take you along for the ride on each interview, recounting the journey our guests have taken to get where they are, inspiring you to create your own path to success. Let's get started.
Cathy:Hello. I'm Cathy Worthington. Welcome to an inspiring episode of Leapboomers with our guest, doctor Tristina Anderson, who will reveal secrets for turning life's biggest challenges into launch pads for success.
Merry:And I'm Merry Elkins. Get ready to hear the author and former c suite executive's practical strategies for boomers to think braver, embrace change, and discover new untapped powers within themselves. Welcome, Tristina.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Thank you, ladies. Kathy, Mary, and your audience, thank you for having me.
Merry:Wonderful to have you.
Cathy:Thank you. Tristina, please tell our Boomer audience about your journey and how you overcame the challenges that you faced and transform them into opportunities.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Oh, well, I have to go back a couple decades.
Cathy:Uh-huh. Yeah.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. Good place. I think the biggest milestone that, I had to kind of transform is, on August 2, 1996, I was 25 years old and almost 6 months pregnant, and I was told by my family physician that I was HIV positive.
Cathy:Oh, my. Yes. Oh, my.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yes. So, it was quite a shock that was 28 years ago. And back then, an HIV diagnosis, was a death sentence. So my doctor had told me, I probably only had a couple years to live and same with my unborn child. It was quite a shocking, situation.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:My goodness. Yeah. And that's kinda probably where my initial journey started, going through that, having to work on forgiveness. I received HIV from my husband, and he had known about the diagnosis and didn't disclose it.
Merry:Oh.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And that's really kinda how I wrote my, memoir, Resilience, Picking Up My Shattered Pieces. I ended up being married to this gentleman for 25 years. I actually had 2 children through the whole the whole process. Both of my children are HIV negative, but what that, did for me is put me in a mindset of regardless of your situation, circumstances, and your conditions, you can build a life you absolutely love. And that's kind of how I did my whole design.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:In fact, when when I was younger and and growing up, I lived a very privileged life, not spoiled, but privileged. I grew up in a home that had an indoor swimming pool, skiing, and stuff like that, And my parents end up getting divorced when I was 13 years old.
Cathy:And I
Dr. Tristina Anderson:yeah. Right in grade 9 and, you know, transported from the high school where I knew all my friends to a town where I didn't know anybody. And what got left behind, though, was an alcoholic father. So when and, had had an alcoholic father, my mom started a new life, and and that actually put in the mindset of me when I was growing up that I was never gonna be financially dependent on anybody. So we went from this home where, like I said, had an indoor swimming pool, had horses, had all these things to living into a low rentals where my mom's vehicle ended up getting repossessed.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Wow. Big change. Yeah. So that kind of put the mindset into me is that I needed to be independent for myself. I need to do these things, of course, fast forwarding to when I end up getting married and being in my early mid twenties, 25 years old, and being diagnosed with HIV, having to go off work earlier, not being able to do the things I want to do, like breastfeed and be on mat proper mat leave.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I ended up having to apply for social assistance because my husband wasn't, we didn't have after the diagnosis, we didn't really have that great of a relationship as you can imagine.
Merry:I can imagine.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. So we end up Yeah. Kinda living fairly separate lives. And then again, like, a lot of happiness end up happening. Like I said, I had 2 kids, both HIV negative, and I was as I was building that financial independent in the back of my mind, I was thinking I have to build wealth for my kids because I don't know how many how many days, how many years I have left to continue to work.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:So I ended up getting a master's degree, a doctorate degree, working in the c suite, but I ended up spending a disproportionate amount of time at business, and I had these 2 beautiful children I couldn't spend any time with. Mhmm.
Merry:So I
Dr. Tristina Anderson:was feeling that tug of war, and we we talk about, especially as women, mothers, daughters, spouses, all that thing, we always talk about work life balance.
Cathy:Mhmm. Right.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And that that that terminology never really clicked with me because the definition of balance is equal distribution, and you can't have equal distribution. The other thing I thought that was kind of really weird when people would say, oh, do you have work life balance? Well, then you're assuming that work is one pillar and everything else is another. But in actuality,
Cathy:we're
Dr. Tristina Anderson:one person, and we wear all different hats.
Cathy:And it sounds like along the way, you you must have gotten healthy.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. I'm I'm very well.
Cathy:Obviously didn't succumb to the AIDS in the 1st year, like you said.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. So I ended up being on medication right from the get go. I was very, very lucky, that I end up getting diagnosed, and and my husband got diagnosed at the same time. He was starting a business, and he needed to get a a swab for health insurance in Canada for insurance. And I thought, well, you know, we're I'm in my early mid twenties, and that's the responsible thing to do is to get life insurance because I'm pregnant and we were having a child.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And had that not happened, I would never have known, and the outcome would have been a lot different.
Merry:So
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I believe that things happen for, a certain for a reason. And I kept that HIV diagnosis to myself, up until when I wrote the memoir about 3, 4 months ago. So I never disclosed that to anybody because I thought being in the business world, being in the boardroom, being all of these different things, I thought people would feel that I did something wrong, that I would have shame, that they may not wanna continue to work with me, which is which is wrong.
Merry:And they might that. And they might be afraid of being close to you.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:All these different things.
Cathy:Right? And it's easy to feel that, and we we all we all would think that people are gonna judge us like that.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah.
Cathy:And and they might have, but it's interesting now that you're on podcast talking about it. You know?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Well, and that was that was, so, again, fast forwarding many years, I end up divorcing, that gentleman that I was married to, and I and I found love again in back in 2018, and I but I carried that with myself to say, who who would love me? Which is, again, a horrible thing to say to think about yourself.
Merry:Right.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:But I was think, you know, I'm in my forties. You know, I had 2 kids. My kids were growing up. My son was back in in Canada, and my daughter was, you know, just 16 years old. But I thought, who would who would want to be with with me?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:But I actually went to a, a psychiatrist and psychologist and talked about these things, and they said, you know, HIV now is more like a chronic illness. You take medication every day. I'm a very healthy person. I take my health very seriously. So my doctor at the time said to me, she goes, you can find love again.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I'm like, I don't know. I'm not sure I wanna wanna do this, but I end up, meeting this wonderful man.
Cathy:And then it took me online. Me online.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:In person in person.
Cathy:In person.
Merry:The way to do it.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:But it took me about 6 months, to gain the courage to disclose my health condition. So we dated and dated, and I thought,
Merry:I
Dr. Tristina Anderson:it took a long time. And it was actually I I'm sure you ladies know the author, Brene Brown. Yes. All the courage and all that stuff, and and, I mean, I just love her.
Cathy:So She's brilliant. Wonderful.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And she talked about vulnerability, courage, things like that, and I thought, I deserve love, and I deserve to be happy. I am a good person, and I end up getting the courage and and and disclose my health condition. Of course, we got married and and all that kind of wonderful thing.
Merry:So he obviously That's is great.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:He said, yeah. It didn't matter.
Merry:That's wonderful. Yeah. Christina, talk about resilience and tell talk about why it's so important, and also tell us more about your book, Resilience, picking up my shattered pieces.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. I think I think as individuals, we have to be or build our resilience in order to move forward in the world. We all have a sad story. We all have things that have happened to us in our past, and without the resilience in moving forward, we we could fall back into the, our circumstances, our conditions, the woe is me, all of those type of situations where in life, you you have all that's available to you. Right?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:It's taking those courageous steps, being resilient to move forward. I mean, we don't know how much time we have on this earth. Right? You know, I think of life as an hourglass, And, you know, there was lots of times where I, you know, played small, didn't wanna do the things that I should have done, and have a voice in the platform. But probably the last 4 or 5 years, I thought I have a story that should be shared with others, and build up that resilient life regardless of what happens.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:As far as I know, we're only here once.
Cathy:How long did it take you to write the book?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:About 6 months.
Cathy:That's good.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. 6 I mean, it's my memoir. The first version I actually wrote, didn't have my HIV diagnosis in it. And, I talked to my kids and my husband about it, and both my kids and my husband said, if you're gonna tell a story, your story, you should tell your whole story.
Merry:Absolutely.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And I was like, I don't know if I have the courage. And they said, you you got this. You can do it. And I did.
Cathy:Well, give us a little advice on what steps we can take to begin designing our ideal lives.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I think that some of the best things that we can do is really take that step back and say to yourself, what would I love to have in my life? Again, regardless of our current situations, is build your life by design, not default. Most of us get up every single day and we do the same things today as we did yesterday because we get into that, you know, the hamster wheel. And I talked about earlier about, spending a disproportionate amount of time at work and seeing my kids left behind and my kids were getting themselves up ready for school. Sometimes I get home really late, driving to work, back to work and one one year we went actually, on a holiday to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And so we actually end up doing that quite a few times and we were there 1 year and my my son said to me, he was going into grade grade 10, he was just finishing grade 9, he said to me, he said, mommy said, why couldn't we just live here? And I said to him, you know what? I might be able to make that happen. So I sold my house in Canada, and again, that's building your life by design. I didn't know how it was all gonna work up out, but I trusted that the universe was gonna know or whatever your beliefs are, God, all those things.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I knew somebody knew that I perhaps didn't. And I think once you make a decision in life, the universe or whatever opens up and things that you didn't realize was gonna happen was gonna happen. So I sold
Cathy:my house to
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Canada, bought a house sight unseen in Mexico. I mean, I was familiar with it, but I bought it online sight unseen. Got a really good deal because it was post, the US market crash. So I bought it from an investor in the US. I got a really good deal, made all the arrangements, and I moved there with my kids.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Now I had a lot of outside individuals say, it's pretty irresponsible of you, don't you think, to pick up and move your kids to Mexico and this and this? I didn't go with my husband. We were still married at the time, but they didn't know about my health diagnosis. And I thought, again, because I kept that private, I wanna give my kids the best life that they could possibly have, including me. I wanna spend time with them and do all these things.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:So I just took the steps that I could and and I think that's where the brave thinking and the resilience comes in is don't be afraid of what the future might hold.
Merry:You know, I wanted I was thinking about that when you were talking about courage, and I thought most people are so afraid to take that step. So talk about how we can embrace fear like you did and use it as a catalyst for growth because I think even looking at people who are older, who've done so much with their lives, taking the next step is is a fearful moment. Talk about it, please.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. And, you know, I think in life, it's it's, I one one person that was in my life years ago said, you know, the graveyard's full of irreplaceable people and never let desire become regret. And so again, another book by Bonnie Raher, I don't know if you guys have read it, but she talks about the 5 mistakes, the 5 regrets that people have at the end of life. And so, one of the things that I do when I work with some of my clients is live your life regret free. Right?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:You know, when you get up and you talk about fear, yeah, fear is sometimes debilitating, and you can get up and you feel nervous going on the stage, or you feel nervous telling somebody you love them for the first time, or you feel those things. But when you actually go and you're at if we get to the point where we have the ability to lay our head down for the last time, I think we wanna close our eyes for that last time and say, I played full out, not I wish I would've said I loved you more, or I wish I would've done that. To me, that fear, I'd rather be scared and do something than have regret and and live my life saying, I wish I would've done that.
Cathy:Right. And and then what about how vulnerability plays into this? What's the power of vulnerability?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I think I think you you have to be vulnerable to live a true authentic life. When I think about different things in in my life about true vulnerability, the first one was, being really vulnerable is telling my husband my my husband, now that I had HIV. I had to be vulnerable in order to have this individual in my life, and I was actually at a crossroads to say, you know, am I willing to walk away from this relationship, this wonderful human being, or am I gonna be vulnerable and be courageous and take the steps and and and and disclose? Because in my mind, I was living in Mexico. My husband lived in Canada.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And so in my mind, I played out, well, what's the worst that can happen if I tell him my health diagnosis and he doesn't wanna have anything to do with me? I'm just going back to Mexico. That's where I live anyways. Right? So I was kind of playing these emotions in my head, and and again, I think that's the the vulnerability.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:The second major vulnerability moment in my life is is writing my memoir and disclosing my HIV status.
Cathy:Yeah. Did you have girlfriends even that came up to you and said, what is this? Why didn't you tell us?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Well and yeah. A lot of people. My second so I did 2 book launches already. My second book launch was to my family, my aunties, my cousins, who nobody knew, and I and I wrote passages outside the book. The only person that knew was my mom and my stepdad, and I had my aunties, my cousins, everybody there that I've been close, close, closer with all my life, and they were just, like, shocked.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:One, they said to my mom, I can't believe you carried this for 28 years. Yes. Right? Yeah. And and the other thing too is is I told you nobody knew.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:When my ex husband and I were going through our divorce, I had to disclose, my health our health conditions to my 2 kids. They didn't even know.
Merry:What did they say?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:They were they they well, they were 6 years they're 6 years apart, so my son was 22 and my daughter was 16, I think, at the time. So my son, he was sad that that I didn't tell him, but he understood why. And I said, I didn't tell you because as a mom, I was protecting you as my child All these years, I would've just honestly, my ex husband and I hadn't got divorced, he ended up having a few affairs while we were married. So I had some legal requirements I had to do where I had to contact these ladies and I had to let them know that my ex husband was HIV positive as we were going through this divorce. So my kids were gonna be impacted.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:So I had to let them know before this was gonna happen.
Cathy:That is such a heavy thing to have to go through, and no wonder you didn't want your son to know because as he's maturing, why should he carry that?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And I
Cathy:didn't know And you already knew that he was negative. Yeah.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:So he
Cathy:didn't he didn't need to know because you'd have him checked.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Well, and that's that's the thing is too is sometimes when kids are younger and they're in it and and totally innocent, they could just say, oh, you know, my mom and my dad are both HIV positive, and they accidentally say something to one of their friends. Their friends accidentally say something to their parents and their parents say, you're not allowed to go to that house anymore.
Merry:That's right.
Cathy:Oh, yeah.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Right? And we just didn't want that burden for our kids. So I explained to them why and they they understood.
Cathy:Yeah.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. And it's just part of life now. Yeah. Mhmm.
Merry:Let's pivot a bit here and talk about your corporate life and how you can apply what you learned there and tell us, of course, what you were doing, but but how can we apply that to our own personal transformation?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. So I spent a lot of time, like I said, building in the in the c suite as a CEO and and, CFO of organizations. I actually owned an airline in Canada, and I was CEO of an airline in Canada, pre COVID, during COVID, and post COVID. Yeah. So I'm I'm
Merry:okay. Yeah.
Cathy:Kind of amazing.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I think in when we're looking at, again, especially as as women, if we do have children or we don't have children, but, you know, if we have aging parents, all those type of things that we spend, giving to organizations. And, you know, I was within organizations for probably about 8, 10 years as a CEO and CFO, and I left the corporate world and became a consultant to help, organizations who are going through mergers and acquisitions. So to create this create a shareholder value. So I would be like a parachute CEO. The board of directors or the owners would terminate kind of their c suite.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I would come in with other individuals. We would help them organize their, strategic plans to provide the greatest shareholder return, and then I would replace myself and move on to the to my next, client. I got paid very, very well. But what I what I noticed after a while is, you know, these individuals who were giving everything, sacrificing doctor's appointments, sacrificing their relationships, sacrificing their kids, sports. They were being terminated because they weren't meeting the corporate objective.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Did you not somewhat they did anything wrong. They may have not had the proper skill set, but at the end of the day, they had a responsibility to provide the greatest value to their shareholders. So, again, it goes back to when we work for organizations and we sacrifice that time, it's not mutually beneficial. The corporation isn't coming back and saying, oh, I'm sorry that you had to, you know, miss your son's hockey game or your daughter's this or your anniversary or your birthday. It's like you need to continue to do what you have to do.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:So when I look at transformation, it's it's trying to find the harmony within your life. Like I said, they talk about work life balance. You don't have a work you and a life you. Yeah. We kind of we kind of meld or whatever, but you just have a you, and you wear many different hats where you're the wife, you're the mom, you're the daughter, you're the sister, you're the best friend, and you have to try to juggle that time.
Cathy:So when you Basically, you're working all the time.
Merry:That's right.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. And especially now with technology, your smartphones, all of those things is being in some of the industries I was into, aviation, forestry, there was a corporations now expect their CC suite staff to be on. Right?
Merry:All the time.
Cathy:All the time. Reachable. Yeah. Reachable within 5 or 10 minutes. Right?
Merry:If that. Right? It's like Exactly. I can have one minute.
Merry:10 minute. Immediately. Yeah.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And I think when you look at transformation, it is, again, taking that step back and looking at yourself thinking, am I am I happy? You know, am I am I achieving my purpose in life as opposed to just getting up and doing everything over and over and over again? And, yeah, I'm I'm gonna be 54 years old this year, and it's probably only been about the last 4 or 5 years where I've really put more focus on the the whole me as opposed to the corporate external external stuff. And I and I think we
Cathy:we get
Dr. Tristina Anderson:into these into these, again, these hamster wheels about, well, I'll just do this today and you talk to your kids. I know I've been guilty of it. I've told my kids, oh, I'm sorry. I can't attend your dance recital. I have to go this or or, you know, you minimize those really important personal roles, that should be the highest priority.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:But our culture just doesn't seem to work that way. So Yeah. I think when we talk about transformation, it's really just transforming the you, the I am. Right?
Cathy:Mhmm. That's very good. That's very good. You've talked a little bit about this before, and I was gonna ask you if you have anything else about moving to Mexico and how it impacted your personal and professional growth. Were you still doing corporate stuff from there?
Merry:Yeah. I would. Yeah.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:So I relocated there about 14 years ago now, and I would just fly back and forth to Canada. I mean, I had been in consulting for for quite a while at this point in time as well, and we're used to working remotely back then, way before COVID, a lot of us
Cathy:And you had your own airline?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Well, I couldn't travel on that, but yeah. It was small. No. Oh. It was smaller.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. We didn't we didn't fly. I would have to make too many stops in order to get
Merry:Oh, that's right. Yeah.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. Yeah. But I I, had in my own home office, and I would get up, and and I did both my master and doctor degree remotely. So I did my, master's degree at University of Liverpool, and I did my doctor degree at Cal University. So I was very used to working and be responsible for the things I had to get done.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:So I would work at home.
Merry:That takes discipline.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. My kids would be in school, and I'd go to work in my home office, and I'd fly back to Canada when when I had to. Sometimes it was, you know, once a week. Sometimes it was once every few weeks.
Cathy:Did you have any sort of family network or people that took care of your kids in Mexico when you were in Canada?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Sometimes. Yep. Sometimes I'd ask my I'd call my step dad and I'd say, hey. Can you come down and watch the kids? Yep.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Take a vacation. Yeah. Come down and do that. I mean, over time, we end up getting some really good networks, or I end up getting some really good networks of friends that my kids went to school with. And I would usually only come back for 2 or 3 days.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:So I'd I'd fly back, have one day meeting or 2 day meeting and fly back. So it was usually only, like, a 2 or 3 day, and and my kids would stay at their friend's place or something like that. So over time, I end up getting a pretty good network of people that would come stay at our house or my kids.
Cathy:Complicated. Yeah. It's very, very complicated to be even to be able to leave town like that. My gosh.
Merry:Yeah. Really. Really. It and and how did that emotionally help you as far as transformation and growth?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I I think it, I got to spend key valuable time with my children. Right? So when we moved to Mexico, like I said, my son was going into grade 12, my daughter was going into grade 4. I got to spend that, it wasn't as chaotic as when we lived in Canada. Right?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:We got to have more precious time together, and I think again, that just transforms you as an individual, when now we can look back and we have those memories that we would never have had if I wouldn't have taken a step back when we were in Canada. Because again, we get into this, our personal mindset, I guess, in Canada, and I think it's fairly similar to the U. S. Is, you know, work first, family somewhere down here. It's second, but it's a far second, and then your community is way down in the bottom.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Right? Like, you you just kind of live in these little bit of bubbles. In Mexico, the culture is a little bit different where you put your family first, and then your community and then your work, which is an actual better way to think about our purpose in life and why we're here.
Cathy:Mhmm. I agree.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I got to see firsthand on how families interacted with their kids and how the kids interacted with their families. Very funny different things. Like, I was friends with with my kids' friends on Facebook, and we would all kinda communicate together. In Canada, you would never have that. Like, I would never be friends with my kids as friends because the the culture is different.
Merry:Yeah. Mhmm. Yeah. Not not the thing to do on Facebook.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:No. Exactly.
Merry:Absolutely. Yeah. But but being in a different culture must have been quite a change for everybody.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. And I I think it it, there was a lot of things that we had to embrace. I mean, there was many times, of course, going there, you know, I was unfamiliar with how they did things in Mexico as opposed to how they did things in Canada. So things that we take for granted, you could just run to the local grocery store here. I wasn't able to do that.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:In fact, probably about 5 or 6 years of us living there, I didn't even have a vehicle. So I'd take the bus, or I would walk, or the kids would take a taxi, or we would take the taxi together, and, you know, having to get them registered in school, having to open up a bank account, like, all of these things that when you're in your home country, you just learn by what your parents did. But going there, even though there's a lot of expats in Puerto Vallarta, they didn't have kids. They were usually retired. So I had to
Cathy:network with
Dr. Tristina Anderson:a different group of people, Mexican families, who was like, okay. Show me the ropes. Right? How do we do this?
Cathy:Mhmm. Yeah.
Merry:Yeah. Well, getting back to brave thinking because I I guess I think we all need it no matter what stage of life we're in. What are what do you think are the key principles of brave thinking? And tell us how we can apply them.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I again, I think it goes back to sometimes even if we're standing in a crossroads and you look to the left and you look to the right and you look what what what you would absolutely love, and it's scary, you need to put on that brave thinking cloak or whatever to say, I'm gonna still do it scary. I don't know what the outcome's gonna look like, but I am still gonna do it even though I'm scared. And you just take those one step at a time, one step at a time. I mean, we can still always change our minds, but again, I think it's it's we're here to live, I think, the best life that we can. Try to do it as regret free as possible and take those chances.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Because again, we don't know how much time we're gonna have. You know, even if it, if it's not, you know, loss of a job or an illness or something where, you know, I wish I would have done those things when I had the capacity to do it for whatever circumstance.
Cathy:Mhmm. For sure.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I think that's where we have to be brave and act boldly to to say, I'm gonna do it. I don't know what it's gonna look like, but I'm gonna I'm gonna have faith in myself and trust in myself and take those scary steps.
Cathy:Well, tell us how we can change our mindsets and release scarcity so we can attract prosperity.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. Well, if if your listeners, they go to my website, I also have a free downloadable book, which we can talk about at the end as well. But again, when you talk about releasing mindsets and scarcity, it's getting up and being in the now, regardless of the situation that's going on. So, with the actual fact, there is certain facts
Merry:in our lives. Your bank account balance may
Dr. Tristina Anderson:not be exactly where you want it to be and, you know, we talk about different things about abundance and stuff, but you you have to be the I am. Right? The walking the walk, doing the do, putting the putting the cloak on as I am this person. This is my bank account regardless of what the factual situations are. This is the birth this is this is the reality I'm going to be living in.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Saw that you're being a fake person, this is who I am while it's all working out. Mhmm. Mhmm. So, again, there's, yeah, different types of of mindsets and and off glad to offer your, listeners, a free download for sure.
Cathy:Oh, that's great. That's great.
Merry:Do you have a road map for personal transformation? And, also, how can you advise, say, boomers to follow that map? People who are people who are in another a a later act in their life.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:I don't think I don't think there's there's anything that's ever too late. Some of the some of the most significant changes in people's lives happened later in their sixties, seventies, and eighties. I think it's recognizing that you want to try something new or you want to embrace a change, that's the key. Right? Is, you know, sometimes, a loved one, a spouse, a partner may have passed away, or you find yourself divorced, or you're now retired and you're sitting back and you're thinking, well, now what?
Cathy:Yeah.
Merry:You
Dr. Tristina Anderson:know? As when I was younger, I wanted to do a, b, and c. But now I'm a little bit older, the bones are a little bit more stiff. I don't know if I can do all those things, but we all still have life in us. Maybe you wanna do, a cooking class or maybe you wanna do painting or or crocheting or or write a book, all of these different things, climb a mountain, but it's just taking the steps and realizing, taking that step back, asking yourself, what would I love?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And then what can you do with what you have from where you are to take those little baby steps?
Cathy:Yeah. And Mary and I really get that because we've both lost our spouses
Merry:Mhmm.
Cathy:And we've had to regroup. And now we have this podcast and we're moving on, but it's it's there's a lot of things, obstacles in the way that we have to think about and deal with. And so we've been we've been a good support system for each other, really.
Merry:We certainly have. But even then, we I wake up some mornings and think, what am I gonna do today? Where am I going? What is this all about? You know, what's next?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Yeah. Well, I think I think, you know, you guys have you've you've taken some scary steps yourself. You started a podcast. Right? And and and like you said, both of your spouses have passed away, so you've had to redefine who you are in the space that you're occupying.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:And it sometimes it is difficult where we have those sad days or those sad moments to get up and dust ourselves off a little bit and move forward. But, I mean, kudos to both of you, like, with your podcasts and scary steps.
Cathy:Yes. Scary steps.
Merry:Mhmm.
Cathy:Justina, what would you like our audience to have as a takeaway today?
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Well, your audience can definitely go to my website. It's www.unlockyourpowerwithin, all one word, dot c a. There's a free downloadable, PDF on abundance there, and there's also different programs that your listeners may be interested in. They can absolutely reach out to me to see if if some of the programs I have that they may be interested in. Yeah.
Merry:Thank you so much. That sounds great. I'm gonna do it. Thank
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Excellent.
Merry:Thank thank you, Justina.
Merry:Thank
Merry:you. Our guest today on late boomers has been doctor Tricina Anderson, author of resilience, Picking Up My Shattered Pieces, former c suite executive speaker, and life mastery consultant. And, again, you can reach Tricina and download your book at www unlock your power within, and, thank you. Dotca.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Dotca for Kathy. Don't forget
Cathy:for those people.
Merry:That's really important.
Cathy:People on this. States don't realize that.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:You're saying. Well, and another thing, Mary and Kathy, if your listeners are interested, my memoir can be found too at, www.resiliencebook.ca. And, again, there's some free gifts there as well if they if they register. So, I
Cathy:think we're interested
Dr. Tristina Anderson:in reading that.
Cathy:Yeah. Sounds good. We wanna thank our listeners for subscribing to our podcast and for checking us out on YouTube and recommending us to your friends. We appreciate you, and we'd love to have you give us a 5 star review. And we wanna hear about your experiences with late boomers and what gets you inspired.
Cathy:We are on Instagram at I am Cathy Worthington and at I am Mary Elkins and at late boomers. Thank you for listening. Please join us next week when we talk to integrative wellness coach TK Mitchell, who will help all our boomers unlock the secrets to reclaim our health and purpose so we can rock our golden years. Thank you again, Christina.
Dr. Tristina Anderson:Thank you, Kathy. Thank you, Mary, and thank you to your listeners.
Cathy:Wonderful. Thank you for joining us on Late Boomers, The podcast that is your guide to creating a 3rd act with style, power, and impact. Please visit our website and get in touch with us at lateboomers.biz. If you would like to listen to or download other episodes of late boomers, go to ewnpodcastnetwork.com.
Merry:This podcast is also available on Spotify, Apple Podcast, and most other major podcast sites. We hope you make use of the wisdom you've gained here and that you enjoy a successful third act with your own style, power, and impact.
